The Diva Series

Happy New Year!

2009-01-02T15:40:00.000+08:00

I've been working and travelling. No chance of taking pictures of my beautiful KL. I'll be back in Malaysia towards the end of April. And because a lot of clients and theatre associates want to know what I'm up to, I've decided to, occasionally, blog over at my online CV. If you (and I miss all of you!) want to read my latest exploits head over to Edwin Sumun.

I wish the eternal blessings of the universe to you for a good year. Love always.

mistletoe & wine

2007-12-13T14:24:00.000+08:00

I know I'm not the only one feeling that the year went by faster than the previous one. However, I'm eternally grateful for 2007. Work, love and life, to sum it up in one word, fantastic! Looking forward to closing the year and ushering in the new one.

And yet, we live in a time of unrest, adding to the already strained society trying to find a comfortable balance. The fluffiest of fluff makes it to the cover of news, sometimes washing over the important stuff that matters.

So, where does that leave the individual? How can I claim what is right for me when I have to dismiss my dreams and join the unrested thousands and grab what is right for all?

These days, I feel we're not asking the proper questions. Questions that have answers. An acquaintance asked me what I thought about our recent government-tagged upheavals. I said we're thinking too literally. It's time to spread out and go lateral. And we forget we're not a western nation. We live in a region going through a materialistic phase. The rest of the world is in post. For us, it's all about gain and it's dirty.

My suggestion: Play the game but join it with intention to unlevel the playing field. Play fair and make it smart. Nobody likes to sprayed with acid.

Which brings me to this time of year. A season of giving. So give it your best shot.

burger me senseless

2007-12-09T13:33:00.001+08:00

The Daily Grind is now open for business! This is a shameless promo for a dear friend's brand new F&B outlet. Juicy burgers and killer milkshakes. Where? Bangsar Village.

We were there last night, beers all round and stuffed. My burger craving is finally satiated. I've been waiting years for a good burger in Kuala Lumpur. Now it's here, I have no need to have a burger the first thing after arriving in Singapore.

I've also posted some shots of the delectable food over at my Flickr page. Go have a look, salivate and make your way to The Daily Grind.

Burger yourself senseless!

*virtual subliminal message: Kylie X is now in Malaysian music stores. BUY!

let me serve you

2007-11-28T22:22:00.000+08:00

This part of the world is currently enjoying an expensive consumer lifestyle. We're slowly but surely being given what the rest of the consumer world recognizes as customer service. But with all the staff training sessions and plethora of new(?) products, do we really care if service is with a smile but the product doesn't live up to advertised quality? Will we part with wads of cash simply?

Yes. No.

I'm a sucker and I spend. My latest acquisition, a new broadband service. 2 to be precise. Maxis Broadband and iZZi. I got a full refund for the latter after only 24 hours. I must admit, iZZi is more cost conscious but reception is slower than Streamyx. I live in the middle of the city where there are 4 antennas covering a combined 53km radius. When I returned the wireless modem and get my refund, the sales staff asked if I lived in a condo cos the higher you go, the better the reception claiming the antennas are placed on hilltops.

I'm sorry. Pardon? RM98 a month. 12 months paid upfront + activation fee. Came home with the modem and CD-ROM. Couldn't install. Drive back in traffic only to be told I needed to download a driver which was not included. Got it. Came back home. Plug and no play. 100kbps was the fastest speed I got for living ground level.

So, I decided to sign an 18 month contract with Maxis Broadband. RM138 a month. Only needed to pay RM100 activation fee. No problems connecting. All sorted in 20 minutes of signing up and logging on. I'm now clicking an average of 650-800kbps at home. 2 Mbps around the city centre. Blazing (for now.) But 18 months, you know?

iZZi and Maxis staff smile a lot. Very friendly. Great.

So how?

We're suckered into a snappy lifestyle.

Slowly but surely, we're losing the battle.

THEY are winning the war.

Let the buyer beware. Blue pill? Red pill?

Ten-Ten-Ten!

2007-11-21T00:41:00.000+08:00

November has seen me emceeing several 10th Anniversary events. I just came home from one.

I thought it was funny but then, you know the universe has a way with things. I realized today that 2007 marks 10 years since I decided to return home. 1997 must've been quite a year.

What happened then? Let's take a short walk.

1) I graduated from Uni. A political scientist (really?)
2) Tony Blair is appointed Prime Minister of the United Kingdom
3) I failed my final auditions to enter The Royal Academy of Dramatic Art AND The Guildhall of Music & Drama
4) I played Macbeth in Germany (maybe that's why i failed to get into Drama school)
5) I retire from acting, packed up and came home.
6) President Bill Clinton bars federal funding for any research on human cloning
7) I get a job as Research Manager for a production company
8) Diana, Princess of Wales...gone
9) Mother Teresa too
10) Hong Kong returns to China
11) I'm asked to join The Instant Café Theatre Company
12) Stock markets around the world crash because of a global economic scare
13) The term "weblog" is coined by Jorn Barger
14) I decide to stay and not go back to Europe
15) My career as an actor in Malaysia begins.

Ta-da! 10 years on, I know who I am and accept the joys and pains the universe has showered on me.

Yes, this is a feelgood post. We live in a bad place now and we need to unlearn and relearn the lessons we learnt so many years ago. Things will always change and we must change with them. How else can we walk freely forward?

Stay locked and stubborn if you wish. Your choice. I made mine.

Eid is now!

2007-10-13T14:22:00.000+08:00

Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri! It's been a whole month of fasting and facebooking. Ramadhan is like Lent, you give up (some say sacrifice) a certain number of things to prove to your God that you have, are and will continue to be a good person. Did I fast (give up food??) Did I only log on to Facebook once a day? A big fat no. I ate more than ever and you know I poked all day long. But I am a good(ish) person.

However today, we celebrate all that is good and wish each other the holiday greetings. I sit back and thank the Universe and the memory of my late father for all the joys they have given me so far this year. 2007 is moving fast and I'm riding the wave as if channeling Kelly Slater's spirit.

What do I have to celebrate? I'm directing a play with 2 incredible actors, I'm dating someone, I've already been booked for 2 huge shows for 2008 and next week, I perform in my 2nd Jazz show. Positive thinking is definitely the way to go.

My friend's have told me of this book 'The Secret' and I think it's fabulous how some people have started to sort themselves out from just reading it. I have no need to read it. I believe enough to know there are no secrets when it comes to my life. It's whether I choose to accept the answers that stare me in the face. Or ignore them cos I'm too damned blind.

And best of all, Kylie Minogue returns with her best album to date to give me the tunes to dance as I close the year. Kylie X will be released November 26. Mark it!

2 months to go. 2008. Hell yeah!

facebooked

2007-09-12T16:14:00.000+08:00

I really must slap myself for not only succumbing but being a bad crack-addict on this thing called Facebook. Why oh why is it so good? I really should be doing things like ironing out the details of the play I'm about to direct, wash my filthy car, eat...

So, here I am taking a break from it.

The traffic in the city has become unbearable. The heat is unbearable. Though blue skies are a comfort to see. No hazy hazy. I was a near a damsel in distress at class today. If the temperature went up by one degree, I would've fainted and my students would've stomped all over me.

I'm speaking nonsense. It's not that hot. My students were very well behaved today. And they actually finished their homework. A first for this class.

This heat is making me loopy.

the week before it began

2007-08-25T13:40:00.000+08:00

Independence Day is less than a week away, and as traffic begins to swell on the city's one-way roads, the nation is in full celebration swing. Which poses my question: what are we actually celebrating? Do we even know the actual history of how our nation was born?

Everyone has their own song to sing. The lyrics change with each interpretation. A mellow beat warped into a shrill scream, unheard.

As I sit here, waiting for a batch of laundry to go into spin cycle... Spin cycle. Wet things spinning around until every juice of water is drained from every pore of material. Once its done, I chuck it all in a bucket which I take out to the drying line. Then I wait again. For everything to dry so I can take it to the ironing board. Press. Steam. Everything is fresh as new.

Is that what we're celebrating? The change of the times, the lack of historical truth in our textbooks, what?

Raise a flag. Feel proud.

Where will your flag be in December?

2 Nights of Jazz

2007-08-17T12:12:00.000+08:00

And so, the nights finally arrive. I make my debut at the Top Room, singing 6-8 Jazz numbers. Together with Malaysia's best female jazz vocalist, Junji Delfino, lost now found blues mamma, Shantini Venugopal, and musical theatre songbird Maya Abdullah, we'll take on some standards and showcase an original number or two. Friday 17th and Saturday 18th, begins 9:30pm.

I'm singing! I'm Singing!!

Check this out!

another year arrives

2007-08-12T22:03:00.000+08:00

I turned 33 yesterday. Still a young man I am. A few people were surprised. Many expected me to be in my late-30s. I'm not surprised. Looking at my usually worn and tired face, I don't blame them for thinking me older. I also take it as a compliment knowing I'm seen as someone who knows and has done a bit more than that boy down the road. With that, I say thanks from the bottom of my shallow heart (shallow only because of my age, not my superficial need of owning my umpteen pair of Crocs!)

My birthday came round this year not with bells and whistles but with a dose of what needs to be done for me to grow a little wiser and play a little smarter. Past birthdays, and parties, have always left a bittersweet feeling. I used to ask why I bother throwing parties and celebrating. Always very hesitant but went ahead with it. The next couple of days after would see me wallow and question nearly everything that hadn't even happened yet. Yup, I was that kinda guy. Never completely happy to simply enjoy the coming of the years.

That's why this year was surprisingly different. No worries, no questions. The same friends and a few new ones. A fabulous dinner with a bellydancer and lots of whiskey manipulating my every move on the dancefloor. Doesn't sound very different from past years. However, it was and is.

I'm still a bitch. So, I've been told. But I don't care anymore. Work is great, friends even greater. Why on earth should I be worrying about things like boyfriends and money? That's a question not worth thinking and mulling over.

I had a fabulous party. I mentioned that, didn't I? Two great shows coming up. And very possibly a trip to Cambodia by year's end.

Lots of stuff to look forward to.

a little chick has flown the coop

2007-06-04T13:25:00.000+08:00

I received a phone call today. Not a very pleasant one. Shocking and left me speechless.

A wonderful little person whom I had the pleasure of meeting and hanging out with has suddenly left us.

Valerie Tay. You will be missed and I pray that a flight of angels will sing you to your peace.

Godbless.

one month

2007-04-23T23:30:00.000+08:00

Ooh, I didn't realise a month has passed and I've not posted here. April is a week away from it's end and what a month it's been! A widow whose late husband converted to Islam after marriage has had her child taken away from her by the Islamic authorities. This is the second time something as ridiculous as this has happened in this great country of mine. Elsewhere in the world, namely the USA where anyone can own a gun, a stressed-out Korean student goes on a rampage, kills 32 people and then himself. The French elections saw one of the highest voter turnouts in their recent election history. More flooding and dying flashing on our TV screens and in our newspapers. In the past few days, we've learnt that schools in the UK have decided it best to stop teaching about the Holocaust and the Crusades. What?!?

How can I even begin to enjoy the gifts I have received? Well, I have. It helps to ease the tension of the nonsense. Yes, I call it nonsense. Someone is not doing their job. And that's nonsense.

I have been blessed to have been given the chance of working with a group of individuals that show me, on a weekly basis, that life should and must be enjoyed and celebrated. Every waking moment. No matter what. They continue to show me that innocence can never be lost.

Tomorrow, they'll continue to surprise me.

that's the way I've always heard it should be

2007-03-22T19:30:00.000+08:00

The weather's dreary these days. But does that reduce the possibilty of enjoying yourself? I think not and I know you'll agree.

It's been an eventful week so far. It all began when I met a friend for lunch and we decided to browse the new Borders after. Sifting through the jazz section of the CDs, I found some absolute rare gems that no other store had. I was whooping with excitement when in my hands were 3 Sarah Vaughan albums I'd been hunting for what seemed like forever. These were albums she recorded for the Pablo label, considered by many to be some of the best stuff in her career. I couldn't agree more. She was in her fifties and her voice had lost none of it's virtuosity but developed a deep resonance that was remarkable. Sarah Vaughan's musicality and superb craftmanship of interpreting lyrics IS second to none.

Here's what I found:
1) I Love Brazil! (Jobim and Nascimento on this album!)
2) Copacabana (nothing to do with Barry Manilow ok?)
3) Linger Awhile: Live at the Newport Jazz Festival 1957 (bloody fantastic!)

These albums kept me company while I made my way to judging a college drama competition. Good job kids! Kept me entertained for 2 evenings.

Yesterday, I bought, online, the ultimate Sarah Vaughan album, her 1973 concert in Japan. Digital download. No need to wait for the postman. I was in paradise for 2 hours!

Today, as I was about to leave home for a recording of my own, the postman tooted at the gate. I had a package. From a friend in Singapore. He sent me a CD. Mark Murphy's new album, Love Is What Stays. Brilliantly produced by Till Brönner (very sexy German trumpeter!)

Yay! I've been enjoying the traffic.

Went to watch Frank Miller's 300. I see now why people have been telling me I'm Xerxes. But really, would I wear that much jewellery? Good to see Gerard Butler without his Phantom mask.

Tomorrow is the final round of the above mentioned drama competition. I'll be in traffic again, which usually gets me in a foul mood. These kids can count themselves fortunate that the CD changer in my car will keep me in a swinging frame of mind.

ps. Melinda Doolittle is the next American Idol. And Blake Lewis is strangely sexy.

come on down

2007-03-09T20:44:00.000+08:00

I'm feeling better. Not down and grumpy. Why? Because 1: I helped a good friend buy her DSLR (and her first few shots are fantastic!) and 2: I'm getting out of KL for a couple of days. Going Down Under, Singapore that is. Going to chill with some kids and watch other people get creative and all theatre-like.

Will be introduced to a young man, whom one friend wants for me to give him acting tips and another friend who says he's good-looking and swings on my side of the parade. Oh dear! I'm in for a spot of distraction. If I suggest for him to "feel it", he'll think I mean emotions and I'm thinking...you know what I'm thinking! I'll be wishing it's more than just thinking. I prefer to think out loud. Very loud. Yeah baby kinda loud!

Oh yeah baby! Have a great weekend!

i should be so lucky

2007-03-07T00:30:00.000+08:00

Hello Every Body! What a month has past! I missed celebrating most of Chinese New Year because my lower back acted up again which made me bedridden for the first few days of the festival. Then spent the rest of the time recuperating. Only got up on my feet last week. Had to do a show on Saturday. In 5-inch stilettos. Back in pain. Sharp pain shooting down my left leg. What the heck?!? All this at 33. I tell you, I think I should sell my house and retire. Go buy a hut in a village perhaps. This of course kills my plans to buy a bicycle. Can't pedal. I wonder if bicycles come in the one pedal variety?

I haven't taken a decent photograph. My mind is a mess. I can't remember appointments. Nor string a logical sentence together without some crass comment flying off my tongue.

Thank god for trance music. And Sarah Vaughan too.

Will be back with a smile soon.

alltogethernow

2007-02-13T15:14:00.000+08:00

The girls and me finally got together. Not all of us flew over to Sydney for Cheng's wedding. But when the wedding came to KL this past Sunday night, we all got a shot in before we sauntered to the bar. Yes, we were pissed-faced! Good ol'fashioned headaches and stinky hotel room.

One thing is confirmed: A wedding is only fun when you're part of it. Not as guest cos it's bloody boring and tedious. How many times have you been to a wedding, as a guest, and couldn't wait to leave?

I also need to take a breather from my friends Johnny, Macallan and Dom. Soda on the rocks pour moi.

Class of '07 (l-r): Seows, Cheng, Wei, Candice, Way Cheng, Me & Shen (or Ivy to the boys!)

a new leaf turned

2007-02-04T23:18:00.000+08:00

And so I'm back, from outer space. I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face. Well, don't fret my pet. I was very close to deleting this blog. Why? I don't have much to complain about nowadays. I've kinda let things go. In other words, I have other more non-trivial matters to occupy my time. Photography is one of them. I just came back from a wonderful holiday and took a lot of pictures. Even renamed one of my dormant blogs and turned it into a photoblog.

For the one reader that's been following this diva's footsteps (yes you WMW), you'll know that I've been spending my days over at KLDP. Now you can join me on my wanderings at Vision 20/20, see over at Mirrorball for the link.

Work also seems to be on the brigther side of things. This years looks set to be quite a busy one for me. I have a fund-raiser to plan for my company. I was fortunate to have HSBC in the Arts include Sumunda in it's sponsorship programme. Not very much but enough to get some balls rolling. So, if you have any ideas, please feel free to pass them over.

Now back to the luscious holiday I just came home from. Sydney in Summer. I went because a dear friend got married. In the park on a lovely saturday afternoon. Had a drunken night with another friend as we consumed two bottles of white in an hour while we flirted with the waiters. She was infuriated that one of the waiters touched my shoulders instead of hers each time he walked past. Is it my fault I'm the better flirt? The man was straight. The power I wield. Aaaahhh....

There were so many moments on this trip. Most of the spare days we had after the wedding, I left the girls to go mad in the shops while I sat on park benches under trees drinking latte after latte. I can't seem to get enough of Aussie milk. One day, my friend Pod took me on an early morning coastal walk which went from Bondi to Bronte all the way down to Cavelli. It was absolutely breathtaking views of the clear sky and crisp waters lashing against the rocks and sand. There was even a graveyard on one of the cliffs. All the tombstones faced the sea. Nothing spooky about it. There was a sort of serenity when I walked past. Of course, Pod and me stopped for a latte. Stupidly, I forgot my swim shorts. Luckily, the girls and me had decided the day before that we'd all meet at Circular Quay and head to Manly beach. I called them to pack me a towel and shorts.

Then whoosh! I dived into the cool water and the rest they say, was the best holiday I've had in my history.

I would like to thank Bills for the ricotta hotcakes and coconut bread. And Longrain for the Gin Sin and Stigmata cocktails. But most of all, thank you for waiting.

It's good to be back.

I'm Back???

2007-01-16T23:05:00.000+08:00

Zoë asked me whether I've abandoned The Diva Series. No no no, just taking a sabbatical, as all Divas must evry now and then. However, I have this feeling I won't be away for much longer. Any day now...any day.

god bless the child

2006-11-25T13:42:00.000+08:00

Some of you may remember how this blog got it's title. Two days ago, the last of the great jazz divas that was featured on Verve Records 'The Diva Series' passed on. A woman of immaculate style. Anita O'Day.

And the music plays on. Rest lovely lady.

connected

2006-09-13T01:25:00.000+08:00

Lots of madness, tons of fun and a bagfull of wonderful memories. Thank you for these pictures Puteri. Thanks Old Man.

MUST BUY YOUR TICKETS NOW!!!

2006-08-24T16:27:00.000+08:00

W!LD RICE in collaboration with Five Arts Centre and The Actors Studio

present
SECOND LINK
THE SINGAPORE-MALAYSIA TEXT EXCHANGE

“The most satisfying two hours I have spent in theatre… Encore please.”
SPH The Straits Times LIFE!, Singapore

“Daring… it skillfully brought to life the way local writers are testing the boundaries.”
International Herald Tribune

Directed by Ivan Heng.

Curated by Eleanor Wong, Alvin Pang and Leow Puay Tin.

Featuring an All-Star Singapore-Malaysia cast!:
Anne James
Edwin Sumun
Fahmi Fadzil
Gani Abdul Karim
Jonathan Lim
Karen Tan
Lim Yu Beng
Neo Swee Lin
Reza Zainal Abidin
Sukania Venugopal

SECOND LINK is a provocative, insightful and humorous performance celebrating the work of Singaporean and Malaysian writers. Directed by Ivan Heng and featuring a stunningly accomplished company of 10 actors from the two countries, SECOND LINK will surprise, delight and reveal the obsessions and concerns of the cities' denizens and artists.

This explosive physical theatre showcase of more than 50 celebrated texts was a hit with audiences and critics in Kuala Lumpur, Hong Kong and Singapore. Expect laughter and fresh points of view as the Singaporeans and Malaysians perform each other's stories, icons and idiosyncrasies, even as they playfully invite you to make up your own tale of two cities.

Venue: The Actors Studio Bangsar, Level 3, Bangsar Shopping Centre, Kuala Lumpur.

Dates & Tickets: 8.30pm, 30-31 August ’06 – special 49th MERDEKA price RM49!
8.30pm, 1-2 September ’06 – RM57.
3.00pm, 2-3 September ’06 – RM57.

Student & senior citizens (55 and above) – RM25 for all shows.

Box-office: The Actors Studio (tel 03-2094 0400 / 2094 1400).

For more information, call/fax Five Arts Centre at 03-7725 4858, email fivearts@tm.net.my
or visit Five Arts Centre Online

for those with the masks

2006-07-17T22:29:00.000+08:00

everybody wants to be a winner and take their place at the top
everyone wants their name up in lights, for the good times never stop
sometimes the bad luck will creep up and catch you by surprise
your mind's confused, you feel misused
you've got to leave those troubles behind

sometimes you win, sometimes you lose
sometimes you wanna cry
sometimes you play the fool

when you cry the whole world laughs at you
they don't seem to understand
but the time will come when the tables turn
and you're gonna have the winning hand

hold on a little longer
try to be a little stronger
and you can win
you can win
and everything is gonna be yours

sometimes you win, sometimes you lose
sometimes you wanna cry
sometimes you play the fool

you gotta hold on
the time will come.

~ patrick moten/sandra sully

Like the title of the post says. You don't have to hide behind a mask just to make yourself feel better. People aren't blind to your fears. The more you hide, the easier it is to see. Take off the mask before it all comes crashing down. If you need to be a bitch, then be one. If you need to be a baby, do it. If your insecurities are making you insane, embrace them. Don't brush them aside. Don't pretend that everything is roses. How many diets can you do? How many pretentious Yoga sessions can you go to? How many lies?

The wall gets higher and higher. It's best you kick it down yourself. Because if someone else does it, you'll suffer the consequences. All on your own. Good times are just that. There will always be bad times. It's how you experience what is laid out on your cards. There's enough crap happening around the world. We don't need another friend turning into a stranger.

sorry seems to be the hardest word (for you to tell me)

2006-07-12T17:10:00.000+08:00

Roger Federer is KING!!! Italy... too bad France. At least there's Zidane. The news has been depressing for the individual. A RM 200,000 fine for not carrying your Identity Card. Now that's been knocked down but still. Who the hell came up with that figure? Criminals get away with less. Priorities people please!

If some of you are wondering why I'm irregular with my Diva postings, it's because I'm postiing over at Kuala Lumpur DP on a daily basis. Completely absorbed. Head on over if you miss me.

Till then. Go buy The Body Shop make-up. Well, not until the new range comes out in August. Wonderful stuff!

And Rafael Nadal needs to come over for dinner sometime.

blah blah blah-ing

2006-07-05T14:40:00.000+08:00

Wimbledon Open women's draw: As expected the top 4 seeds have made it into the semi-finals and what a pleasure it was watching them all win their QF matches last night: Amelie, Justine, Maria and Kim. Let's see how the men fare today.

Then I wake up today to find out that Germany failed to make in into the finals. Tough. There's goes the free meal I made a bet on. Now, I have to pay for dinner.

Not much happening on the local news front (none that I care to shed a word on that is) and that leaves me wondering, where am i going to get my fodder from? No canon blasting for the moment. Well, it has been relatively quiet. Everyone absorbed in a month of hooliganism I think. Notice even politicians have taken a break. For fear no one takes the time to hear them perhaps?

I don't know. I've been enjoying these days and shudder to think how life carries on when Monday comes around. The same or will there be a new twist? Will the end of the World Cup actually bring about a sense of realisation that we are living in a supposed First World country but have the mentality of a Third World nation? Does anyone actually care? Will customer service finally exist here? Will there be taxis when you need one? Where's the next cup of coffee coming from?

That's it. I'm going out to take some pictures.

ps.(for the Malaysian viewers) I'm a guest on NTV7's Thursday Night Live tomorrow night.

ac-cent-tchu-ate the positive

2006-07-02T15:48:00.000+08:00

marriage is a conspiracy. read the agony aunt section of the papers.

friendship is an over-used word to describe a selfish existence between 2 or more people.

and people still don't smile enough.

am I having a bad day? on the contrary, I'm having a wonderful day.

today. so how?

2006-06-27T23:39:00.000+08:00

Bless Star World Sports for it's live coverage of the Wimbledon Open. My fever is still on the tennis circuit. The rest of you can take your M.C.s from work to do your fancy footwork on the sofa or at the mamak stalls, who, by the way, are making a ton of money while you sleep at the desk. You snooze, you lose.

I'm sitting here pondering the next step in my illustrious photography career. Only just started and already I'm sending in my pictures for competition. Why not? All in the name of finding the perfect balance between theatre on stage and theatre through the eye of a camera. This new hobby has opened my already wide eyes even more to the subtle details of the humdrum of KL life. I even got a chicken to pose for me. I say that's quite an accomplishment! Chickens don't even stop for on-coming traffic. It seems harder for humans to stop though. Everytime I ask someone to pose, they run. Just stand still ok? Where you in a hurry to get to? Football? You can kiss my balls! You may have been the winning picture, twat!

Oh, Steffi Graf is watching her husband Andre play! I love Steffi! By far, the most talented female tennis champion. Ok, time to stop and watch the lawns of Wimbledon. I forgot to turn on the telly. Can't you believe that?

you go to my head

2006-06-20T20:42:00.000+08:00

Back from a wonderful trip. JB is great, Singapore is good for the soul and KL is home sweet home. Got Randy back yesterday and he looks smashing (no pun intended)!

Care United Club Johor Bahru, kudos to a job well done! You are truly a charity everyone should use as a model. The amount of effort that you ladies pour into your work only humbles me. Thank you so much for letting me be a part of you if only for the weekend.

I haven't had much time to read the news and crap since coming back yesterday. Anything interesting I should worry about? Sugar still a crisis? Siti Nurhaliza married yet? No? Well, tough titties. Doesn't leave me much does it?

I think I should be an Apple Computer consultant. I seem to getting a higher buzz from helping the KL sales staff sell iPods and computers. I'm avoiding watching any theatre work. I'm getting just a tad bit tired from the same-ole same-ole. Funny innit? My passion right now is thinking of ideas of keeping open The Top Room. The most wonderful place in town to listen to Jazz. It's only 3 months old but the owners are thinking of possibly shutting it down. Why? Not enough bums on seats. Last weekend, the incomparable Mike Veerapen Trio performed to an audience of 6. That's right, S-I-X. This is the very place that I'm supposed to sing one day (lord knows when, I'm never good enough it seems) and if it closes down then what? Pay the daylight robbery rental of KLPAC and TASB? You can fuck that!

I just don't understand why the Top Room isn't jamming with people. The only time I've seen it filled was opening night. What a fun night that was! The music then, as it is now, FANTASTIC!!!

So, if you, like me, don't want to see the end of a dream, head over to The Top Room and leave your comments and suggestions. Can?

diva im-mobile

2006-06-14T16:38:00.000+08:00

The weather is dreary and I have meetings and errands before I drive down to JB/Singapore tomorrow for an event this weekend. On my way back to meet a friend who had to pass me something to take with me, I met with an unfortunate accident. An accident that I have been expecting for the last 2 years. You must think I'm a tad bit looney for saying so but it get's loonier. A Feng Shui man I consulted a few years ago predicted my career would take on new levels but I had to be careful cos I would get into an accident. He said, "In between 2-3 years lah."

SCREEECCHH!! BAMMMM!! White smoke billowing from my bonnet!!! And half an hour later, I'm booked to fly instead (courtesy of my gracious clients) and Randy is in the workshop. Here he is!

So now, I'm going to 'mandi bunga' and 'buang sway' (in foreign tongue: Wash myself clean of negative energy)

And you know, the funny thing is, I was dreading the drive down. And now I'm flying. Oh, how the Universe works!

new vintage

2006-06-13T12:12:00.000+08:00

Lightning cracking, a threatening storm and it's only 12 pm. I come back to The Diva Series with only minor changes happening in this little world of ours. Federer tried and failed yet again. Henin-Hardenne showed why she was once World No.1. Schumacher and his team's excuses. Our Malaysian government and their excuses. In Singapore, people would be hanged for a saying a bad word against Minister Mentor Lee. Here, a Tun, a title bestowed only to the worthiest of worthy, faces ridicule of the nation.

Yes, Mr.Tun hasn't been the most popular of leaders with the supposed elite. But dare I say this? Piss off! The man has made some very suspect decisions but really, where would we be today? Still that jungle people (foreign) think we're living in. As a past leader, he is entitled to comment on the policies of the present government. The press, of course, milk it for all its worth. As residents, we have a choice of reading the news or not. Today, front page, a sugar shortage with a picture of a man with a trolley looking at empty shelves in a supermarket. Ground-breaking reportage innit?

And now the rain falls. The sun will rise again. But when?

Until then, I savour the cool breeze wafting through the window-panes.

Are You Ready?

2006-06-09T18:29:00.000+08:00

for the return of the Diva himself (yes, that's right - ME!)?

epilogue

2006-04-05T17:24:00.000+08:00

I remember when I started The Diva Series, I asked myself how long the attraction would last. Sitting in traffic today, I realised that it had long faded into a mere memory of a forgotten lover.

Thaksin has won the elections in Thailand, Car prices dropped, petrol prices are up and an employee of Strüdels was killed as he opened his outlet one early morning. Like I said, the news depresses me.

Today, during an important script writing session (I accidently left my phone on) I got a call from a woman named Jackie. She's from something-something TV Australia. Her news to me was this: Candice and me have been short-listed for Amazing Race Asia. Candice missed the call and now she's pissing in her panties. Just as exciting is that American Idol comes on in an half hour.

So, what I'm getting at is this: I'll be blogging elsewhere from now on. The Diva is on sabbbatical. Thank you so much for being here these past few months.

I leave you with one last Diva shot.

Don't close your eyes, run into my arms, so that I can hold you tight.
Don't close your eyes, lead into your charms, baby let me hold you right...

Do right everyone. Till then.

postscript: I'll be back

Many happy returns...

2006-04-01T00:37:00.000+08:00

April Fools Day. The day that marks SUMUNDA's birthday. We are 2 years old!

Winning awards, collaborating with foreign theatre pratitioners, difficult clients, generous sponsors... But all this doesn't compare to the reception of the audience. Thank you so very much for making my work all the more meaningful.

and Happy Birthday to Apple for making the most desirable products and my designing life easier

scene one, take one

2006-03-29T19:09:00.000+08:00

In the last two insomnia-fueled nights, I watched 3 excellent movies: 2 of them starring my much-admired idols and one that just blew my mind with clever cinematography and editing. Is this a movie review post? Possibly but according to some twats I'm too critical and too much of a perfectionist. So, let me prove them right (just for now) and not do a review per se. I'll just be all warm and glowy and rave on the excellentness of these movies.

Mrs. Henderson Presents with Dame Judi Dench and Bob Hoskins, directed by Stephen Frears. Wonderful costumes. You don't even notice the amount of CGI used. Flawless execution on a beautifully crafted script set during the Second World War. Simple at times but tells the story of a woman who has lost both husband and son, who, in her old age, decides she wants a hobby. She buys a theatre, hires a manager, gets some dancers to go full monty. The chemistry between Dench and Hoskins... you just can't buy it, priceless.

Keeping Mum with Dame Maggie Smith, a serial killer of sorts, Rowan Atkinson and a scrumptuous performance by Kristin Scott Thomas. Labelled as Black Comedy, this is British humour at its best. Patrick Swayze (him of Ghost fame) makes an appearance and I was pleasantly surprised by his comedic prowess. The scene that really got me was... Oh no, can't tell you, can I? Kills the surprise. Directed by Niall Johnson. Clever. Incredibly clever.

This next one, I don't know where to begin. It's simply brilliant albeit the questionable American accent of one Mr. Ewan McGregor. Good performance but that accent... Aiyo! But less than 10 minutes into the movie, you forget about the accent as Stay sucks you into the world that crosses between reality and illusion. The cast includes Naomi Watts, Ryan Gosling and appearances by Janeane Garofalo and Bob Hoskins. A psychiatrist, played by Ewan, meets a strange and mysterious young man, Gosling, who claims to want to commit suicide in three days, the day he turns 21. Naomi plays Ewan's girlfriend who was once his patient. Ewan's sense of reality gets questioned everytime the young man seeks his council. The editing (Matt Chessé) and excellent direction (Marc Forster) takes you on a roller-coaster ride. Twists and turns and even at the end, you, the audience, questions whether it's the end. If I ever had the opportunity of directing a movie, this would definately be one source of inspiration.

Present film-makers, especially the younger generation, seem to have a firm grasp on the MTV culture that is prevalent in the society. Fast cuts, minimal dialogue, catchy graphics/imagery and music that I thought would remain locked in my private library.

Tonight, I battle insomnia again but will have to win as I have an early day.

Demi Negara Yg. Tercinta

2006-03-26T14:52:00.000+08:00

As I wait for more answers to the question I posted lord-knows-when, here's another one. This year's theme for the Cameronians Awards Night is 'Your Malaysia.'

What is Malaysia to you?

All bloggers' answers welcomed.

sanguine

2006-03-23T19:45:00.000+08:00

So, it's 11 A.M. and I arrive at the Mandarin Oriental just in time to have a cup of BOH Cameronian tea and mince into the press conference. The Cameronians are divided into 3 categories: Dance, Music and Theatre. I cut my nails earlier in the day to prevent any unnecessary nervous biting trés un-glam. The wait was killing. The Dance nomineess were announced first followed by the Music nominees. You know, I was kicking myself silly inside. The wait was killing (I said that already, haven't I?)

Cue dramatic music in my head. The orchestra plays the overture. Ladies and Gentlemen, the nominees for Theatre are...

Okay, so I got that one nomination that I expected. Best Lighting Design. Yay! A tear formed in my eye. Yes. That was the one. Up till today, people still talk about the impeccable lighting design in Electronic City. Happy lah I! BUT, it didn't stop there.

Best Set Design, Best Costume Design and, pour moi, Best Music and Sound Design. 4 Bloody Nominations!!! Yeeeeeehawwww!!! (one short of last year's 5 but 3 more than my ego expected.)

After all the cheshire cat grinning, I had a quick lunch and rushed home to take Henry to the vet. Finally, he let me carry him into the car. I'll leave out all the gory details at the vet (he was screaming blue murder!) and three hours later, he's home recuperating. He better remember his lesson learnt and not do another runner. He's up and about already. Supposed to be sedated till night but he was trying to get up 30 minutes after sedation. My boy is a hero! One lucky dog he is and I'm one lucky owner. Woof Woof! Bow Wow! It's the year of the Dog and I think I'm getting another one soon too. That brings my canine tally up to 4.

Those of you who want to check out the nominations: Cameronian Arts Awards 2005 and there's an Audience Choice Award hint hint (ChiQ, you know what to do...Again!)

'Tis a cheerful day despite the traffic, storm and falling trees.

What's on the news today eh? Electronic City, Sumunda and me, that's what. Screw the rest! Yeah baby yeah!

today?

2006-03-22T22:25:00.000+08:00

Henry looks miserable, Avian Flu has well and truly taken over the headlines and I missed Alexandré Despatie win the 1m Springboard Gold. And yet, I have a smile on my face.

Tomorrow is the Cameronian Arts Awards Nominations Announcement press conference. Butterflies in my tummy as I breathelessly wait to see if Electronic City, the play I directed last year, will garner more than one nomination. It's not that the awards are something I need to validate my theatrical existence. I just want to win a couple. Note that the operative word is WANT. If it does win, that would put Sumunda in a win-win 100% success situation. A company that's only 2 years old, only done 2 productions and both are award winners. That, for me, would be a great present for Sumunda's coming birthday. Why do I want these awards? I can go on doing the work I believe in without the awards. However, with a trophy or two, the corporates sit up and take notice. With that comes the job of getting sponsorship. They see awards, the more likely they are to part with their dosh. Fingers crossed.

Avian Flu. No more poultry for me. I think not. I will eat duck and chicken. We had a beautiful aviary but no more. The authorities decided to kill every single bird in the enclosure. I'm sure a few of those birds were endangered. No need to worry about being endangered anymore. Dead. No more chirping. Dead. Ahh-choooo... BANG! Dead.

Malaysian diver Yeoh Ken Nee was second to Alexandré. That's a great accomplishment for Malaysia. Alex is the reigning World Champion. Which means if Ken Nee was trained properly from now on, he could well take on the Russians and Chinese. The next World Diving Championships and the Beijing Olympics will be a test of his abilities. Good luck but my hard earned emcee fees are on Mr. Hotty Despatie. Oh yeah baby yeah!

What else is in the news today? Who gives a crap!

the prodigal son returns

2006-03-21T14:03:00.000+08:00

I finally fell asleep at 5 A.M. I waited by the door hoping that Henry would find his way back.

Two years ago he ran out and he came back a day later with a 2-inch wide gash on his neck and a couple of puncture wounds on his body. The neighbourhood gang of vicious hounds got him. But he found his way back. That's why I only let him out if I have the leash on him and we walk for an hour or so. I worried so much more this time because my mother claimed he went as far as the main road.

At 4:30, when I was about to give up my wait and head to bed, I heard him howling. Henry was at the gate. Yes, looking very dishevelled but he came back! Gave him a big hug first and we walked into the house. That was when I noticed the gash on his neck, a cut on his testicle sack and scrapes all over him. I tried to clean him but he wouldn't let me. Left him to sleep.

Today he just sits. I've to let him just recover. Tomorrow I'll take him to the vet. Thanks for all your well-wishes.

xx always.

M.I.A.

2006-03-21T00:02:00.000+08:00

Earlier this evening, I came home from a meeting and was about to get ready to go to the launch of KL's brand new jazz lounge when my mother comes in to tell me that she let Henry out and instead of getting him back into the house, she let him follow her as she walked to the shops...on the main road! So, 3 hours later, in the rain and with a friend helping, the search returns empty handed. Of all my dogs, Henry is my baby. The scariest of thoughts is that I live in a Malay area. I asked all and the looks I got... I just hope he finds his way back. I continue searching in the morning.

Did I forget to mention that my mother does not like Henry? She is not the least bit concerned that he's gone AWOL. This puts further strain on an already strained mother-son relationship.

my common wealth

2006-03-19T01:44:00.000+08:00

I've been too busy to flip to the Commonwealth Games coverage but I know I will be watching the moment the Aquatics begin, especially Diving. Why? For only Canadian diver Alexandré Despatie will lure me to drop all business engagements and glue my eyes to the telly.

If this champion of a male specimen isn't competing for his country, I'll continue being busy. Somehow the games hold no attraction for me. Oh look where the Maple leaf is on his Speedos!

And yes, please keep answering the question from the post below. The mystery is yet to be revealed. Remember, the more you give me, the more I can do with it. Muah muah and all that! xx

autumn tactics

2006-03-15T15:42:00.000+08:00

100 watt lightbulbs flashing over my head. Humour me if you will.

What is the one most loved thing you like to do?
(when you're down, sad, dissappointed, etc. to give you a boost)

Please leave your commments. I have something up my creative sleeves.

KLDP

2006-03-13T19:37:00.000+08:00

Hello y'all! Howdy do? Apa khabar and Selamat Welcome of my city! I hope you semua buat very the enjoy and sit-sit for a nice timing here!

Before you wonder if I've gone even further off my rocker, take a gander at my newest blog: Kuala Lumpur Daily Photo. I've joined a worldwide family of photo bloggers who, everyday, show us what their city looks like. KL Daily photos are sights that are interesting and amusing to my diva eye. Today's photo is hilarious! But it shows the state of the English language we are currently in.

Go on. Take a look and explore the world from very colourful perspectives.

lost & found

2006-03-13T10:07:00.000+08:00

I'm back! Completely rejuvenated from a much needed getaway. Who doesn't destress when put up in a Club Lounge room on the 23rd floor of the Raffles Plaza hotel? "Hello, Good Morning Mr.Sumun. Is there anything we can get you?" "Yes, can you make me a teh-tarik?" I then sit on my chaise lounge looking out the balcony window facing the Drama Centre where I'll be performing in August.
"Will you be checking out at 8 tonight Mr.Sumun?" 8pm check-out! What a dream not to have to lug around baggage while I roam the streets of the Lion City.

With a load lifted of my shoulders, I'm ready for KL once again. See you soon everyone!

ho-hum

2006-03-08T01:43:00.000+08:00

Where was I? Oh yes. A busy week. So many appointments and no time to do much else. No news to crap on either. That has led me to post on one of my other blogs, one that I've neglected for way too long. So, that's where I've been (for the 10 of you who are wondering) and I'm here to say that's its gonna be another couple more days before something gets my goat. I'm out of town for the week and will be computerless. Yay! The next few days will give me the opportunity of watching the world go by. I'll be down south: Johor Bahru and a quick jaunt into the Lion City, Singapore. Bear with me while I go live a life that's more than virtual. Oh, and not having to answer emails. That is such a blessing for me.

I cordially ask all government bodies and world leaders to hold off making any irrational decisions until my fingers get back to the board. And wasn't this year's Oscar ceremony disappointing? Please, it's time we saw the Baftas on telly. I'd rather get some British dry wit and humour than watch a bunch of Uhmericans patting themselves on the back for doing next to nothing. Dato's should also just stay in Malaysia (or Hong Kong) and give up having a career in Hollywood. Felicity Huffman was robbed. I'm in love with Jake Gynllenhal. And thank you Keira for your overbite. My friends and me have had a great time mimicking you. Countless moments. Have I left anything out? OH! Candice and me have sent in our Amazing Race Asia application! Fingers crossed.

Onwards to disc 5 of Rome!

agua por favor!

2006-03-03T23:20:00.000+08:00

Polluted water in Kuala Lumpur. That's what happens when you teach pigs how to swim. And it gives a whole new meaning to the word 'septic' tank. Now I understand why everyone around me is ill. Drinking water my ass. Stinking water more like it. Someone is going to blame someone and no-one is going to take responsibilty for it. It took them this long to admit there was a problem. I want clean water. I can't afford to fill my bathtub with Spritzer. It's no wonder my morning coffee has had a muddy taste to it. And all this weight I'm putting on round my waist. I've been drinking several mugs of pork-fee everyday! And did I mention that this queen hasn't held court this past few days? At least I'm saving on the loo rolls.

All hail our developed nation!

no sleep over it

2006-02-28T02:45:00.000+08:00

Okay, Torino is over and it'll be another 4 years before I get to watch any winter sports on the telly. Such a shame. Such displays of strength, control and grace now left to the summer winds as we return to football, football, football and the occasional tennis match. And if you pay extra, you get golf. That's just amazing. If Nicole wasn't a World Champion, no one would give a shit about squash. We Malaysians only want IT if it involves the superficial accolades that come with it.

Just like the work I live in. Theatre. We claim we want it. We claim we are a Arts and Culture savvy society. So, why doesn't everyone want to watch theatre productions that don't involve comedy?

I understand that daily life is tough and you want to let off some steam by getting your laughter medication. That's great. However, theatre is so much more than just comedy. Everytime someone asks me what my next show is, the question that follows is, "Is it funny?"

I was trained in all elements of theatre, and I love dramatic pieces. My career began in a serious piece which made the critics take notice.

A couple of nights ago, I came out of the theatre to greet our audience. This lovely girl came up to me and said how much she enjoyed my making her laugh and how she wanted to see me in my next project. I told her it was a serious piece and how drama was where I shined best. With a saddened look, she sighed an "Oh" and added, "So, it's not funny?" For a brief moment, I felt my heart break from her disappointment. But only a moment.

What hurts is how much of a bum rap drama gets. Unless you're a cute actor people want to drool over regardless of the genre of the play (they'll come in droves), drama is destined to live a theatrical life in arts obscurity. But it is all the genres that make theatre Theatre. Like watching movies, Theatre contains all the amazing, wonderful and subtle elements of our lives. There is nothing truly as breathtaking as a powerful performance seen right before your eyes. Coupled with a script of substance, you are guaranteed a ride of the senses.

I guess that's why I carved a place for myself in this medium. The sensation of experiencing the moment far surpasses the crap money we earn from it. Movies and TV I don't mind doing but nothing gets my heart pounding like a great piece of theatre. And what makes it great? It becomes great when you, the audience, become part of the process of theatre in its entirety.

We do have a growing audience base. We've also lost a lot thanks to the mediocrity that sometimes escapes onto our stages.

We will continue to present theatre to you in all its many faces. We know you're ready.

Come in. We've been waiting.

c'est wunderbar!

2006-02-27T02:14:00.000+08:00

Actorlympics ended tonight with a wonderfully big bang thanks to all of you who cheered us on. The fullest night this whole run! I would like to thank all the cute young men who allowed me to use you for my funnies (and merci to all the girlfriends who sat by and let it happen!) Most of all a big thanks and muah muahs to Visionworks for, once again, the opportunity of exercising my comedic muscles.

Love to y'all. I can finally play with Macallan.

pretty much broken

2006-02-25T02:11:00.000+08:00

48 hours sleepless, a chronic lower-back problem, a knee that goes weak from lack of sleep (it's a dull pain), a new computer waiting anxiously for my tender touch and three evenings of amazing hilarity. 2 hours more and my head collaspes on my four pillows as I stare into nothingness. My addiction to American Idol is keeping me awake just to catch the repeat. I still can't face the news.

Today the headline was Malaysian Airlines losing RM1 bil. That's a lot of Ringgit. Not making any sense. In the New York Times, it was reported that the Danish cartoon uproar has taken a turn. In what direction is left to be seen. After 11 churches burnt down in Nigeria, revered Muslim figures are now asking for fellow Muslims to take a hold of their emotions. The outburst only fuels the media and world people's image of Muslims as angry, irrational and terroristic. They have asked for the people to go back to the teachings of the Qur'an: contemplation and understanding. Don't destroy something as beautiful as the Islamic religion just because you think your personal belief in Allah and his Prophet has been tainted by 'yellow' minds.

A wise friend recently said, "Don't beat yourself up too much about your life. Just take it in your stride one day at a time because there are enough people out there that will do it (the beating) for you."

Your beilefs, usually personal, are yours. If you wish to share them then fine. But you have no right to impose them on others. So, if some fool wants to draw a cartoon, let him do it. Get angry if you want but what gives you the right to torch a place of holy worship? It's very different from burning your cheating husband's belongings in his BMW ala Angela Bassett in Waiting to Exhale.

Where is all this fear and hatred coming from? Insecurities of a loss of identity. The rich get richer they say. Someone somewhere wants cheaper oil prices. Tell me, who will benefit from cheaper oil prices, eh?

I dare someone to do a caricature of Buddha and Jesus in a back alley sauna. Why? I want cheaper Happy Meals and Pop Tarts.

Sleep it off.

dedication

2006-02-24T01:50:00.000+08:00

Bloggers are such boisterous people. A very colourful bunch that just can't help posing for pictures with their favourite comedians (hint: send the pics over girls!) Just seeing your satisfaction after the show is enough to make me smile for the coming day. And don't forget to pimp my blog! If there's Kodok, I wonder what I'll be nicknamed?

Not going to be a long one. Just got home. About to hop in the shower, have a hot beverage and watch the next repeat of today's American Idol.

Oh yes, I would like to announce that I am the first person in KL to own the 20" Intel iMac. It's here! Here comes my shameless plug: Go get all your Mac/Apple products from MacStudio (Low Yat Plaza, KL) and tell them Edwin sent you. They really are a great bunch of people. Nothing against the other Apple retailers but they're bound to Apple Malaysia's policies. MacStudio goes out of its way to make you happy. The owner himself called me today to tell me my new toy had arrived.

I may go missing the next few days as I will be getting acquainted with my as-yet to be named desktop or maybe I'll be blogging about my daily activities with it.

All I can say is this: It has been a wonderful day thanks to the bloggers, Colin Chong, the Actorlympians, Gustina Putri Orow, Mike Tan, all at Imaginex, the TASB Box Office boys, Nick D and you.

No crap world news can get me down (well, for this next week at least.)

I don't know what you want but I can't give it anymore

2006-02-23T01:44:00.000+08:00

Listening to Mel Tormé and the Pet Shop Boy's Pop Art album after the repeat of this evening's American Idol episode surely must have some kind of subliminal residue in my mind and body. I guess there must be as I'm here writing when I should be nursing my aching lower back by getting some sleep.

Are the Danes afraid that they might one day be citizens of an Islamic country? How threatening is this new strain of bird flu? Should I just leave this song on repeat? Am I gonna blog about something worthwhile? And many other thoughts swimming deep.

It's one of those nights. I know I have something to say but finding the words... This song is just too good. I'm getting up to dance.

wassup-eh?

2006-02-20T13:46:00.000+08:00

I'm not one to make big promo sessions but this poster looks damned ganas (fierce) and my friend Reza, in the Hatsumomo getup, is making his return to the game. He's one hellulva comedian and we don't see much of him doing comedy. So, to herald his return, as well as the coming-together of the city's wackiest individuals, I present the first of 2006's Actorlympics runs. Those of you who are in Kuala Lumpur, I hope to see you there. And please, this time when we ask for imaginative suggestions, leave the "Toilet!" one at home. No cottaging allowed on Malaysian stages (much to my chagrin.)

dick with a gun

2006-02-15T19:16:00.000+08:00

Today's News: Dick Cheney's friend, whom he accidently shot while they were out hunting, has had a heart attack. Does that come as a surprise? I would have a heart attack too if I was shot "accidentally" by someone who was helping to run my country.

What is it with Americans and their guns? Never-ending saga that one.

And the bird flu which has affected most of the world is now, according to the Americans, a threat to the world only because it has finally hit them. So big in fact, it called for a whole episode on Oprah Prime Time. Wasn't it a world-wide threat anyway? Where were they when it happened? Where were they for the Kyoto Treaty? I'll tell you where: Out hunting their friends and shooting their animals accidentally.

I just realised something. Countries whose first alphabet is A seem particularly accident prone. America (idiot presidents), Australia (racist politicians), Austria (little man with a funny moustache), Africa (apartheid). Didn't Argentina have some kind of war too???

I think I'd better stop watching and reading the news for the next couple of years.

love today

2006-02-14T00:07:00.000+08:00

exprimere

2006-02-07T22:45:00.000+08:00

In the news today, a woman in France who went through facial reconstruction and religious fanatics challenging the biased beliefs of freedom of expression because of the doings of arrogant Europeans. What is the common denominator between the two? Both are victims of history. Fortunately the woman is the lesser of the two evils. Why? Her suffering led to salvation albeit personal (let's not get into the scalpel of fame her surgeon now wields.)

The religious bunch. Thought nations have been at loggerheads for centuries, it still irks me how simple words can be misconstrued. Granted that some people should be more sensitive when dealing with topics of religion. Yet I can't help but blame ourselves for the situation that we are in.

I was watching CNN today while dancing on the treadmill. Images of Muslims shouting and screaming at policemen. Then the question flashed across the screen: What is the extent of "Freedom of Expression?"

I read it. Twice. Then it dawned upon me. The freedom of expression edict doesn't exist. Has it ever? Is it different for an individual? To me it looks like something someone came up with to cover a guilty ass.

I studied Political Science and when I studied freedom of expresssion, I held it to be a most wondrous thing. The right to express an idea, the unbiased exchange of information, the human justice of living. Now all it is is one big joke. Racial slurs is not freedom of expression. Asking your government for more funds to keep a war going because of freedom is not freedom of expression. Go express yourself somewhere else.

So, we are to blame. The intelligence of Man. As the world grows and becomes truly global with open channels and borders, people regress and become tribes again. Tribes of people that never venture further than the surrounding jungle. Dare I say, narrow-minded.

With every convenience available at the swipe of plastic, it's no wonder we allow our narrow minds to jump at the slightest inconvenience. Freedom of expression is a poor excuse for the common man to raise a club to hurt another. It's like my sorry relatives who snigger behind my back and say I'm a bad muslim because I'm not a pure-bred Malay. What does my race have anything to do with my religion? That's between my God and me. A holy man then told me not to be concerned with my relatives. These were words spoken through lips laced with insecurities. A loss of cultural and racial identity, and religion as a substitute. He added, "If you believe in God, he will believe in you. It doesn't matter what everyone else has to say."

Doesn't every religion teach patience, tolerance and understanding? It doesn't seem the case with hundreds of thousands around the world bearing clubs and weapons of mass destruction.

In our history, wars came about when a sovereign wanted to stake claim on a foreign land or defend his own. Then some idiot decided that religion had to come into play. Now we suffer for it. Just like with everything else we suffer. And most of the time we don't even know why. We follow only because our buddy next door said so.

All that's left for us to do is open a fish & chip shop and run for government. Oh yes, let's not forget a race riot on a beach in Sydney. That's always good for releasing stress. That, and a nice cold beer.

Now that the French woman has a new face, she can live a normal life in a world where at any moment she could lose it again. And I mean really lose it.

prophet

2006-02-03T11:46:00.000+08:00

Music is the verse of the soul, and the melody the quiver of a sweet breeze on a heartstring. It's a fairy's magical fingertips fluttering over a sentimental doorway, opening to reveal hidden memories from the depths of the past.

It is the quivering of a chord, penetrating your ears through the waves of ether, only to exit in the form of an ardent teardrop leaving its langorous trace of long lost love or the painful bite of destiny.

Maybe these notes could exit through your lips as they widen with the joyful smile of fulfilment. Music is a body composed of weary sighs, the breath of souls and the spirit of hearts...
~ khalil gibran

bubble POP!

2006-02-02T22:07:00.000+08:00

Just when you think the sun will keep on shining, it rains. And it ain't rainin' pennies from heaven.

I was winding down my car window and came this crunching sound. now my window is stuck midway and can't wind back up. The workshop I send my car to doesn't reopen till next week.

My youngest, Henry, hurt his paw yesterday and is a nightmare when he's hurt. So, I took him to the vet today. That was a thrill. It took all the strength I had to hold him while he was growling at the vet who tried to take a look at his paw. To top it off, it rained when we were in the clinic. With the window down, my car seats got wet.

Then, when I thought it couldn't get any worse, I get a message that No Black Tie, the jazz bar I was going to do Moodswings at, was closed down by the authorities. No licence. It's not that this is going to stop me from doing what I want, it just means that I need to get a couple more corporate emcee gigs to rent a proper theatre space. This is going to set the show back a couple of weeks or months.

I'm looking at it as a blessing in disguise. With the extra time, I get to perfect the music. Just wishing for these gigs to come along. Rental at our local theatres don't come cheap. I'm feeling pretty optimistic still.

I mean, why not? Only when everything goes wrong can the really good things happen.

Henry's sitting at my feet now. He's not limping as much now and he's smiling too.

I don't have to drive anywhere these next few days.

I'm listening to some CDs I picked up yesterday. Mel Tormé, Sarah Vaughan, Nina Simone. It helps to find my own voice when I listen to a singer's interpretation of my most loved songs. Each singer has his/her own way of wrapping the lyrics in their own silky emotive style. I think I'm very near in achieving my own style of sparkly wrapping.

So, the bubble may have popped and as my other baby, Bella, joins Henry at my feet, I know I'll be blowing another bubble soon.

in memoriam

2006-01-29T20:28:00.000+08:00

"goodnight sweet prince.
may flights of angels sing thee to thy sleep."

Godbless you Richard. Gucci forever.

you'd be so nice to come home to

2006-01-25T14:15:00.000+08:00

I was driving along, as I usually do, when it struck me, 'what the hell am I waiting for?' I want to do it and I've earned enough this month to pay for it. One phone call and it's set. It took me all of 5 minutes to make the decision. Why so long? Because I was playing with the idea of how it should be done.

Sumunda heads into the world of music. A little bit of jazz, a bit of pop, a dose of Soul, and West End musicals thrown in for good measure. And I'm calling it Moodswings: Edwin Sumun - A Love Life in Song featuring the David Gomes Trio.

Oh yes, if mohammed can't go to the mountain then the mountain comes to him (is that right?).

The idea for this show is welcomed solace to my restless and sleepless nights. The only thing I have to battle against is publicity. I can't advertise it. Why? Because the place I want to do it in hasn't got its licence approved yet. So, it's all gonna be done via email and sms, and hopefully 100 friends and their friends will come fill the 2 nights I want to perform. Oh, and I ain't gonna see a return in profits either. I'm pumping in my own hard earned dosh because I want it done. Thank heavens it won't cost much. I would love to get sponsorship. However, it would be impossible to 'put their names in lights' without advertising. Who knows maybe some philanthropist will come along?

All that's left is to figure out the songs with David and Junji (his wife and the most talented Jazz singer in our country) and get them transcribed. I already know which musicians I'm working with: Vincent Ong on bass, Charles Lim on drums, David on the ivories and guest appearances by Julian Chan on Sax, Junji Delfino and Maya Tan on vocals.

Another rub. PGL the Musical goes on February. So does a show thats being planned by Sean Ghazi. Then in March, is M the Opera. Moodswings either happens in the middle of all that or I wait till April, which doesn't seem that far away now. April 1st perhaps as it will be Sumunda's second birthday.

I'm writing this because I want feedback from you. My ardent reader and I would like you to be there so I'd like to book the day when everyone can come.

Let me leave you with this. Hopefully I'll be doing an original as well as standards. And a teaser shot of what I may look like. I'm getting so excited!

Do you want beauty and grace
Do you want to find another place
Do you want to live a life in love
Do you think that really is enough

Can you try and take it all away
Can you try to make a move to play
Can you really live a life in love
Can you say it really is enough

unfinished

"The arts cannot thrive except where men are free to be themselves and to be in charge of their own energies and ardours."
- Franklin Roosevelt

hallmark stronghold

2006-01-23T00:13:00.000+08:00

You have angered Zeus and Hera will not answer your prayers. Three hours later, I watch the re-run of Hercules on the Hallmark channel. It wasn't a very good show but I'm tempted by the tales of Greek gods. As a child, I made my parents buy me books on mythologies of ancient worlds. I read of the great Egyptian pharoahs, the superhuman tales of the gods of Rome and Greece, the legends and myths of Ancient China. There were a great many tales that lulled me into fantastic dreams. Stories of Hang Tuah and Mahsuri didn't fascinate me as much. Pity. The curse bit was fun though.

In retrospect, I now see that maybe it was these childhood readings that sculptured my perceptions of life. Great stories of mortal men who become heroes battling all that the angered gods unleash. Very Barbara Cartland, don't you think? I think so.

Now the bestseller lists list books by Danielle Steel, that Da Vinci code and a million other thriller paperbacks as the words for the mortal man of today. How do we live our dreams if they are filled with conspiracy theories, shopaholic confessions and a really bad movie version of a geisha's ramblings?

We dream anyway. No matter what. I dream of being a father. I don't think that'll come true. The world I frolic in doesn't allow such dreams to come true. However, mentioned in my previous posts and in my daily steps, some do come true. Sometimes luck plays a part, sometimes I become the luck and make my dreams come true.

You have greatness in you. Time will reveal it.

That's a line of dialogue from Hercules (which I watch as I write) and it's been said to me by two people I hold very dear.

I believe greatness lies in all of us. It (greatness) is interpreted however you feel fits your walk of life. I want to learn and share these lessons with as many as I can and be remembered for the presence I've left.

Don't fight for what you believe you deserve. Fight for what you believe is the truth. And that is another way of explaining greatness.

Hercules now begins his first task.

quando quando quando

2006-01-20T16:49:00.000+08:00

I want to experience wisdom. What is it exactly? I mean even wise men seek jesus.

According to the dictionary on my computer, Wisdom is the quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgment; the quality of being wise. I looked up wise and it came up about the same.

Is sound advice wise? What makes someone a wise person? I don't know. A lot of people tell you things. All sorts of things, from the inanely obvious to downright ridiculous.

I was recently asked by a fellow director to return to a production I walked out of a year ago. It'll be a groundbreaking show (I think) and I've been talking to friends about it wondering if I should walk back in. But something in my gut says I shouldn't. My head and my ego say otherwise. Since I started Sumunda, I've lead my life by my gut feeling and it has never failed me.

Is it time to let the twain meet? How do I decide? Something about the show doesn't feel right. When I walked out a year ago, no ties were broken and I walked away with a load taken off my shoulders. However, I've always had that nagging feeling of what if. I left one of the leads and I've been asked to return to fill a smaller one. This is where ego kicks in. With a career and reputation driving in high gear, it is a quandary for me. I have 5 days more to reconsider my involvement in the production.

As I listen to keroncong from Indonesia, soothing as it is, my heart and mind are torn asunder (how diva-ly dramatic!).

Agar hati rindu, ku kan senyum.

I think I will stick to my guns. Decisions must be made. Decisions made on gut feeling always lead me to the appropriate place, and I wonder where it'll be this time.

Success has a price and I've misplaced my chequebook. Will cash do? Or can I write an I.O.U.? Should I do it?

I'm going to watch people hit fuzzy yellow balls now.

today

2006-01-18T23:02:00.000+08:00

These past 2 weeks have been great! A wonderful start to the year. I guess that's why I haven't blogged about the things that happen around me. Well, I could if I wanted to. There have some minorly annoying people that I had to deal with but nothing that warrants a full-on blog post.

So, where does that leave me, the Diva? I'm still observing the world but this time I've flipped the coin. I wonder what I'll find on this side? People who don't return a smile still annoy me. Hey, I don't think people will change anytime soon. Their need for 'speed' overwhelms their internal need for whatever it is they need to live a contented life. The Australian Open is on so I'll be spending most of my days watching the baselines and volleys. I'll pay attention when someone steps up to the net and takes that risk.

Godbless the little miracles.

I leave you with another set of lyrics from my now very overdue album. Maybe this will be the year. Who knows?

Back to Mine

I’m waiting for that day
When the rain stops and the clouds roll away
Ushered to a faraway place by the winds of time
Waiting for that day when I get back to mine.

I’m waiting for that day
When I can walk proud on the streets and say
That I braved it all, no longer pine
Knowing I will smile when I get back to mine.

Now I’m hiding alone in my halls
Seeing the light only when it calls
Only on stage do I stand tall
Back in my room I cry and I fall

Back in love with you
Everytime I hear your name I do
In love with you
There is only me
Cuddled in my room
Wondering of you
Come back to mine.

Now I know hiding is no longer right
All we did in love was fight
But here I am
And once again
Dreaming of your smiles

Back in love with you
Everytime I only wish the best for you
You know I do
The very best of me
Is what you need but
It’s yet to be until
I get back to mine.

la la la...

2006-01-13T15:25:00.000+08:00

Been a whole week since my last post. And the week has been financially rewarding. So good in fact I'm considering purchasing a new desktop computer for my work. Considering being the operative word. And what, I hear you ask, is the lucky item? The newly unleashed Intel Core Duo 20" iMac. It's a beauty and a bloody excellent piece of hardware. I've been eyeing the iMac for a couple of months now and with the Intel processor I'm ready to make the leap.

I've been a Mac user for just over a year. Before that, like the billions, I was on a home-built desktop running Windows XP. 10 years of crashes and headaches, I decided I was migrating to a system that only a select few claimed was THE system to use. Okay, Apple products have always been things to things your saliva drips on and owners are people who don't mind burning holes in their pockets. One fine day, I walked into the store with my chequebook and got myself an iBook. I must admit I got a Mac because I knew it was a status symbol more than anything else. It looked good but never in a million years did I think it could do so much. In the 13 months that I've loved it, I've managed to do more work on it than the 10 combined years on my 'other' PC. It all boils down to the OSX user interface. Many people have said it was daunting but after a couple of days of getting used to the system, I found that it was literally one click of a button to get the job done. I have since convinced 3 of my friends to 'Mac' up themselves.

So, now with Intel on their side, Apple has built the most powerful home-user computer. Soon will come the professional editions.

The world where form meets function.

And if you think this is a shameless free plug for Apple, you're right!

Beauty isn't always skin deep.

philatelic society

2006-01-07T15:40:00.000+08:00

What is it about first impressions? Some of us are first attracted to how gorgeous the person is. I used to be like that. Nowadays, I wait. The first impression is made when I meet the person, we have a brief conversation and then we part ways. Based on that first encounter, I'm 'impressed.' On first impressions, people I meet say I'm funny, intriguing, enigmatic, commanding. Depending on perception, they then say I'm physically attractive. I wonder sometimes what goes on in the minds of men.

There is no right or wrong way of making an impression. You do what feels right. I enter a room and you know I'm there. I never make it a point to be seen. It just happens. We shouldn't force something to happen all because we want it to. Someone once said that I had an aura. Well, everyone has an aura. I think it boils down to personality and confidence. Knowing who you are.

Then in walks the most good-looking person you've ever seen. You jaw drops and you start behaving like a lovestruck little schoolgirl. You forget your senses. And the game of mental cat-and-mouse begins.

It doesn't hurt to allow first impressions to guide your perceptions. You may find out later you were wrong about a person. I sure as hell know I've trusted the wrong person but it's all part of what you need to go through. The lessons take you to another part of your journey. I'm still on it and not planning to find the final destination. I'll get there when I get there. Maybe you do know where you're going to. But you'll never really know how you'll get there. Either way, enjoy the experiences that your life has granted you. And if you like roller-coasters, you're in for one helluva ride!

sense & sensibility

2006-01-06T17:10:00.000+08:00

If Jane Austen was alive, she would be extremely pleased with how her words have been reinterpreted for the modern day reader.

My friends and me went to watch Pride & Prejudice. We were expecting just a good movie. But we were captivated. The cinematography was breath-taking, the performances compelling and the screenplay was, to say the least, astounding. My humble words will never do justice if I were to describe it to you. Never in recent times has a movie been so engrossing. I have a bladder problem but it had me gripped to my seat for close to 2 1/2 hours. I am in love with Mr.Darcy (yet again).

The language was music to my ears. Then after that we went for a late night sup. Nevermind the language heard then.

The Brits just know how to make a great movie. I guess, unlike the Americans, they aren't driven by the market of posterity. Great actors come first. I have had the great pleasure of seeing many of my idols on stage, Dames Judi and Maggie, Ian McKellen, Rhys Ifans just to name drop a few. The magic of their performances never fail to renew my hope of one day being an actor of unrivalled presense. I've come pretty close I think.

Anyway, it's not that I'm knocking the Americans, but looking back at the history of American cinema, you understand why beauty reigns supreme. Talent a very close second. Up till this very day, looks sell the tickets. A handful of actors make it past that veneer. However, the world subcribes to the universe of stars that make you drool when they appear, a world created by Americans unrivalled by any other movie industry (Bollywood excluded).

I would like to thank the Aussies for Cate Blanchett. Good on ya!

Beauty is the word. How we have fallen for it. We don't often see an 'ugly' actor on film, TV etc. The theory I have is this: The Americans use beauty to mask the crap that happens in their country. Maybe Bush Jr. could learn a thing or two because the mask he wears is downright pathetic.

And now, all we ever dream of is Prince Charming (who looks like Tom Cruise) and Amelia Erheart (Angelina Jolie). Unless our chosen partner for life fits this bill, no one will have a chance in hell of coming close.

Anyone watched Carnivale? Great series (and everyone in it isn't drop dead gorgeous). American, of course, so there may still be a chance for us.

caffeinated

2006-01-04T17:16:00.000+08:00

One of my favourite things to do is to sit somewhere with a hot cup of coffee, my headphones on and watch the people around me. Sometimes, I make up little stories about them. Sometimes I write my silly poems. Yesterday was one of those days. I would like to thank Telekom for this. If it wasn't for my crappy broadband service lately, I wouldn't have started again. I used to write a lot. It complements the writing I do for theatre. Now it's back. I ended up writing into the wee hours. To tell you the truth, I'm writing lyrics. I'm hoping this will be the year when I begin recording.

My personal writes usually deal with love (boohoo me!) but here's one I'd like to share. One of those 'people-walking-past' type of poems. Bear with me.

Staring out the window
Is it worth it all?
All the pain imagined
Just to stand up tall

Looking at the people
Living out each day
Second best decisions
Still waiting for that call

Glaring at the mirror
Smiling for myself
Until I see the camera
My smile broadens again

Wanting needing breathing living
The world is a better place
Just keep on believing
The mess is just a phase
Gifts we are receiving
Are simply thrown away
Where are we going?
The day begins again.

copyright edwin sumun 2006

unbreakable

2006-01-02T22:48:00.000+08:00

The second day of the year. Has a nice ring to it. Some noticable changes and some that will never change. Like my broadband service. For the past few weeks, it's been on the blink. Goes off when the rain gets too heavy. Today was the worse. I'm crossing my fingers that it won't get cut off before I have a chance to post this.

Living in a semi-developed country does have its perks. What are they? Well, if you were educated abroad or have parents that stressed the importance of learning English, then it'll be easier to travel. If you weren't as fortunate, then I hope you listened to your teachers in school. However, Malaysians still speak the language...no no no, they don't speak it. They pretend they don't understand you and speak in Malay. Funny isn't it? You can walk straight up to the counter at McDs, place your order in English, the girl behind the counter feigns indifference, looks at you funny, answers you in Malay and still manages to give you exactly what you ordered. The expats here must be having a whale of a time!

But, for those of us who have had the amazing opportunity of seeing the world, we understand that language is never a barrier. Children don't care what you say to them as long as they know the care and love that comes from you when you hold them. Hello is hello in most languages.

I have some 'friends' that constantly complain of dealing with malaysians that don't properly, or can't, speak English. Okay dude, get a grip on yourself. We were lucky we had parents that helped. The education system only encourages teachers to teach the kids of today. But we all know for a fact that English isn't as important as Maths, is it? It's that whole Borrow-Lend debacle that gets my goat. And let's not even start on grammar.

Well lets. A little girl named Judith showed me her homework book. Her teacher made the class draw a series of pictures and then describe them in words. Not only that, they had to write this descriptive sentence 5 times for each picture. The picture Judith drew was of a tree sprouting from the ground. Her sentence was, and she was given a 'very good' marking, 'The tree still not grow yet.' I told Judith it was incorrect. She was puzzled. "But my teacher said correct what? Can you borrow me your pen so I can write it down properly?"

I told her mother and we both had a good laugh. It seems she's at tethers end explaining to her kids about the borrow-lend concept.

Yes, it's tearjerkingly painful what our kids learn in schools in Malaysia. Why? Because they're not going to understand the Aussies and the Brits. Have you seen a Malaysian struggling with the man behind the deli counter at the market in Selfridges? It's a sight to behold.

And what is this 10 subjects minimum for SPM (our O Levels)? Oh, I don't know anymore. We, the system, stress the importance of education. And what is this stress really for I ask you?

Tomorrow I'll be calling Telekom about my broadband disruptance. It will be a very long call. The operator will be speaking in Malay and I will be speaking in tongues.

So, as long as I get my Happy Meal, I'm happy. Ya, large boleh...Large lah...LARGE...Besar? That's all.

Finest Hour

2005-12-31T02:38:00.000+08:00

I'm 31 and this is the 31st day since The Diva Series found it's breath. 360-something days have past. Tonight will see the world clamour and get caught in traffic to get to the countdown point. Some will pop some pills, some will be working, some will be home watching the stars. All will be with friends.

2006. The Chinese astrologists claim it won't be a great year for most. 2 plus 6 is 8. I would like to remind these astro-people that 8 in Chinese means Prosper(ity).

I began this blog because of my re-education of our musical history (as mentioned in my first post). So, I'd like to close 2005 with a quote.

"...whatever was distasteful or unpleasant or uncomfortable or painful - music could always soothe that. All you have to do is reach out to beauty."
~ quincy jones

To everyone I know and have had the pleasure of meeting (both in body and virtual), clink clink!

See you tomorrow then.

love always,
dween

homos genos

2005-12-29T00:38:00.000+08:00

Okay, promise broken and I'm-a-bloggin'.

As we near the end of another year, we look back (as we always do) and contemplate our doings. Then come the new year resolutions to do no wrong and make the best better. I have tried keeping to my resolutions but things never go as planned. Do I beat myself senseless over these failures? I did when I was younger. Not anymore. I do question myself every now and then. However, living for the moment is so much more attractive. Not forgetting the seductive force that impels you into that moment.

I've been in Theatre now for over a decade of wonderful moments. Satire, drama, fantasy... all everyday matters. I started my company because I want to produce works that deal with the human condition, primarily the issue of individualism. The individual in a conformist society, someone who has the right to choose and learn. I'm not too good explaining it right now. Let's skip to my point of the evening.

As a child, I was conditioned to point the finger when a wrong was done. My father taught me otherwise but I didn't listen. As a teenager, my fingers were so stiff from the pointing. My father spoke, I ignored. In my early 20s, the label 'Diva' was bestowed on me by my closest friends (and this label lives on till today). I blamed everyone and everything. Yeah, at the time, the living was good. Or so I thought.

It's been close to 7 years since the passing of my father. And in these 7 years, my finger still pointing, slowly poised itself in the opposite direction.

The educated human race is excellent at blaming the rest of the world for its woes and shit. But we forget, world leaders, politicians, people, get away because we let them. We refuse to admit that sometimes the fault lies in our own selves. Terminally ill children don't blame their parents or doctors. Villagers in Pakistan don't blame the government or God for the earthquake.

In the cities, when the authorities make new road traffic rules, we are quick to say, "Those bloody coppers!" Have we ever actually sat down and thought about why these rules are made?

If a friend doesn't talk to you anymore, do you know why? A lover walks out. Like the saying goes, it takes two to tango.

These past few weeks, I've been cleaning my house and making it the home that was left me by my daddy. My home. The name on the land title grant is mine. Taking control I guess. Responsibility. So many memories came flowing back with every box of stuff I cleared.

Then the moment came. I remembered he said,

"You are responsible for your actions and your life. If there is any sort of trouble or strife, know that there is only you who can get yourself out of it. Don't expect me to help you because I'm not going to be around forever."

To tell you the truth, I remembered it the day he died. And it has been with me ever since. So now the finger points inwards when it should. Painful sometimes but another gram of chip flies off my shoulder.

We cannot change others if we are reluctant to do it ourselves first. The work I direct and produce is greatly influenced by the teachings of my dad and the personal experiences I have learned from. I'm finally beginning to love the life I've been given. If money wasn't always such a concern, I'd love it even more.

More learning and teaching for me. I love it that we never stop learning.

A long time ago, however deaf I was, I listened. (And still listening my friend.)

ou topos

2005-12-25T19:01:00.000+08:00

As much as I’m resisting the urge to post until after new years day, I can’t help how addictive it is. It’s made worse because of my restless nature. Even led me to start another blog on Opera.

An anonymous comment was posted here recently. If I were a bigger person, I’d take it and let go. I’m just tall. So, here it is.

The comment made me think about some things. This anonymous person made an assumption that I was a Scrooge. I have no idea why. Maybe from the tone of my previous posts. Obviously not from the work that I do. I shudder to think.

My faith in humanity is all but disappeared. I only question the society of today. I do believe in an inherent good that dwells deep inside our core. But what is it doing down there? Come out please.

I’ve done a lot of good this year. Because it isn’t made public doesn’t mean it ain’t there. Some charities prefer to remain in the background.

I don’t ask for you to accept me for what I do. I ask for acceptance for who I am. (I didn’t murder anyone but I’m told my looks can kill). And who I am will always question and challenge.

But we live in a today where most people want to be judged for what they do and who they know. Who cares if you think you’re big time? I only want to know who you are. The ‘celebrity’ is secondary.

However, the anonymous person said that I dispelled her/his initial impression of who they thought I was all because I made a simple gesture of posting a Christmas tree. If I didn’t post it, would it have relegated me back to the dungeon of superficiality? Think what you wish. Bah Humbug indeed.

And there it is, my faith in humanity. No matter how trivial and silly it may be, we live for the moment when people remove the blinkers. The moment arrives when it does (can you tell I’ve just watched the Matrix Trilogy again?).

There is so much more to the universe. The theory that animals and insects will outlive the human race is frighteningly true. In our comfort, we will never evolve and adapt. But in our time here, we can make it a little easier for those who want to make a difference.

I believe in the spirit of Christmas and always will. Most importantly, I believe that one day, the questions will end.

Today, before the rain came, I put my jogging shoes on, took the dogs out for a run and, at the end of it, had enough breath to look up at the evening sky. It was a beautiful hour.

Thank you. May all your corners be lit one day.

(and just so I keep my promise of not blogging till 2006, I'll do it at the other one.)

Starlight

2005-12-23T23:00:00.000+08:00

For the first time since I was in my early teens, we have a Christmas tree up albeit only 12" high. It's not that Kris Kringles is making me go ho ho ho and filling me tum-tum with merriment. No, haven't had the spirit in me. Once my grandma went, that was the end of christmas for my family.

So, still in the process of cleaning the house, I thought I'd put up a little one just so one corner would be lit.

Merry Christmas again!

count your blessings instead of sheep

2005-12-19T22:03:00.000+08:00

Finally, all the 'serious' commitments are done and it's time to clear the webs and enjoy the close of a fantastic year. So far, December feels like a summary of all that happened this year. Just as many ups and downs this month as with the whole year. Now, I just want to finish cleaning the crap at home, attempt having a merry little christmas and make my heart light (and the yuletide will be gay!) My star will be hung on the highest bough. We will all be together.

Blessings of the Universe be with you.

Till then.

sanctitas refused

2005-12-15T01:30:00.000+08:00

I started this blog writing about children. This past week I had a 'friend' thing going on. This, I hope will be the last 'friend' post because the term 'friend' needs a re-look.

This evening, I had the strangest conversation. Well, not really a conversation because it was 2 people on their own one-way street. All this didn't occur to me until after the said conversation. This person, Patrick, who I have (up to this moment respected and never questioned his motives or actions) always considered a friend.

We were performing in a corporate event but he didn't acknowledge me in his usual manner. Aah, I knew why exactly but I wasn't going to ask because it was his business. Maybe he was having a bad day. Who knows? Six hours later, in a very formal manner he says, "Edwin, can I have a moment of your time once the show is done?" So, I thought, it boils down to this.

Rewind: action - reaction.

I have always been known to be vocal about how I view certain things. I make no qualms about it because that is what I do and how I feel. I am not one to put up niceties just so you can feel better about yourself. You can do the same too. I'm not going to bug you about it.

I watched a play that Patrick was in and there came a point where I plucked up the nerve to walk out before it ended. I was told he was incensed. That's how I knew he had something to say to me today. He's also pretty vocal.

Now the conversation. He started with, "I'm talking to you as a friend." Okay, is there any other way a friend should talk to another friend? It was about 10 minutes long this convo that we had but there were circles. There was one funny thing he said,
"Did you know when you walked out..."
"I went to the toilet." I said.
"Well, anyway, it made one actor trip on stage?"

Now it's my fault that the actor wasn't focused on doing his job and I can never go to the toilet again.

Every other sentence of his began or ended with 'as a friend' and I was waiting for the moment when we could actually talk as friends. It never came.

I can't remember when my friends last told me that they had to speak to me 'as a friend' because we just talk. And if we do something the other doesn't agree with, we just leave it at that because that's how it is with us. It's your own choices that you make. Friends allow you to make these choices. For example, I have friends who have never been to the theatre and never will because it's not their thing. I am not about to enforce subscription to my way of life. If you don't like it, then fine. You do what you want, I'll see you at the bar later.

However, does this work the same way if 2 friends work in the same industry? It does if one doesn't start with 'as a friend.' Patrick's wife came up to me and simply said, "So, why did you walk out that night?"

Do we have to reaffirm our friendships to each other? Why the pussy-footing?

This Saturday, we have another corporate show together. Awkward as it was tonight, I will be talking to Patrick and will tell him how I feel. Whether we talk as 'friends' I don't know. Let's see how I begin my sentence. Inverted commas?

Birth

2005-12-14T00:43:00.000+08:00

I remember a time when I had no joy or passion in everything that I did with my life. An overwhelming numbness would squat rent-free in my head. Those days, I was well-known for, what my friends term, taking a sabbatical. I went on many of these. Always thinking I would come back better, wiser. A bloody excuse for not getting off the ass in my head to tell you the truth.

A lot of my dearest friends think they know me well. Well, some think so anyway. The rest make their own assumptions based on how I behave in certain situations. Without wanting to know more, they just leave it at that. All I can say is this: I'll leave it at that too. Go live your live okay and not make mine harder to live. It's tough enough without having to explain my every move to all and sundry. The remains of the day.

Then came the day when I dried my tears, lifted my head and started to acknowledge my fears and insecurities, and began to accept what was presented me the day I was born.

When my mother knew she had me forming in her, she decided, being an unmarried woman, that abortion was her choice for living. Her father, and mine, had other plans. With their decision king, I was given the gift to breathe.

It is breath that keeps me sane nowadays. I have a temper and an ego you can only read of in raunchy paperback novels. I forget to breathe sometimes and I used to kowtow just to make the 'world' a better place.

Now I breathe and then say, Go fuck yourself 'cos I've got a life to live. I will stop at a redlight but when it turns green, you better not be zebraing across.

I know what makes me happy, I know the sadness. Euphoria is what I strive for. Hey, what the hell?! If it means I have to wear a wig sometimes, I will. AND I've got the heels to match.

Muah!

(picture courtesy of 3 peas in a Pod)

Like a Dionne Warrick song

2005-12-10T12:24:00.000+08:00

This was taken yesterday. Cheng Han came back from Sydney just for a day, so we got together for lunch (the only time we could all find).

Below is something I wrote and was published in the 2005 mid-year issue of a magazine called 5 Senses.

You hit a certain time in your youth when you realize that it’s time to attempt growing up. That time is when you hit 30. I’m turn the ripe old age of 31 this year and as much as I’m clinging on to my childhood, it’s time to take full responsibility for my responsibilities. What a mouthful! Yup, that’s exactly what responsibilities are, one helluva mouthful. I’m not writing about the endless utility bills, filialness to parents and that entire expected-by-society stiff, I mean, stuff.

In last couple of weeks, I’ve had the immense feeling of being struck down by a ton of bricks. This happens to me every now and then. You know how it is. You feel that nothing is going the way you hoped it would and that light at the end of the tunnel was another fictitious thing that people told you to help make you feel better. You carry it with you and the weight gets progressively heavier without you realizing it. I could’ve been the sinking Titanic if it wasn’t for that fictitious tunnel light. Or lights for that matter. Some of us have more lights than others. I have a group of them. I call mine friends.

I don’t see my friends as much as I’d like to. All of us have our separate lives. However, the charming thing about our friendship is we’ve known each other since we were children. Despite growing up in various parts of the world, we held on and today, we have our own little support group. One of them lives in Sydney. She decided to be true to her dreams and left. She makes an effort to come back once a year. And when that happens, we take time off from work, motherhood, the daily grind and pack our bags and drive away for a couple of days to catch up and be stupid. Earlier this year, we did just that. We got into 2 cars and headed for Batu Ferringgi (Penang, Malaysia). We felt the tremors of the second earthquake. We became very stupid. We called our loved ones. We told them we were safe. Finished the beers in the fridge and told each other how much our lives were still intertwined. A couple of days later, she flew back to her life in Sydney and the rest of us, became ‘normal’ again.

I don’t see how my life can be called normal for the everyday person but trust me; boredom is a word I fully appreciate. Going to the same clubs and bars and seeing the same faces and listening to the same music does take its toll on my sanity. It does bore me. I’m always looking for something new and exciting. Occupational hazard I guess.

Then come the bricks. My down days. I allow myself to get trapped in my dark corners. I turn to myself. I ask questions. Why am I doing this? How did I let that happen, again? What do I do now? Do I get answers? No. Do you? We come up with theories that are never practiced.

But there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel (I am a believer of clichés as you’ve noticed.) There’s always light. That’s something I always forget about. I even got myself a tattoo to remind me. Still forget though.

In the last 2 weeks, I’ve seen my friends a lot. I even went to Sydney. (Well, I went to watch Kylie. But that’s another story.) It seems the universe knows when it should intervene and help give you a shove in the right direction. We cooked for each other, karaoke-d on a work night, gave birth to babies. All smiles. I only told them a couple of days ago. And the support I got, only true friends can give you the blood, sweat and tears of joy. As always, through them, I get my renewed lust for life. Botox for the soul. I’ll come down again and sure enough, I’ll get my next injection.

What I’m trying to express, I think, is how we are responsible for each other and ourselves. We need to remind ourselves to believe in what we need to do to help see what it is we have to see. I may be getting older and have more bills to pay, but growing up doesn’t seem so bad when I have my youth and childhood standing beside me.

CD included

2005-12-09T00:00:00.000+08:00

I love Apples. Red not much, green for sure and the white ones are beyond compare. It all boils down to which one I have each day. Each one differs in flavour.

When I wake, have my Wild Island decaf swiss water roasted coffee, read the sports section of the papers, without fail I must have music. Lately, old friends named Blossom, Sarah, Anita, Lena, Billie, Ella have been my day-long companions. Sometimes I read a red book from Texas, and a-ha, it's in analogue.

I never tire for they keep me occupied especially during the nights when crickets and toads bear witness to the aural delights that stream through my study window.

The very thought of you at last, little girl blue, it never entered my mind. Sweet love, they say it's wonderful. I could write a book with a song in my heart. I wish I were in love again. I didn't know what time it was. Nevermind. Cosy prisons.

Strange fruit.

a review

2005-12-08T00:55:00.000+08:00

we have sacrificed the intensity and truth of emotion for the form and structure of a studied language.

words are just words, empty and hollow without the reason of why and where it comes from.

feelings are like the colour spectrum. so many different shades. anger and forced tears are only but two. let's not just leave it at that.

understanding only comes once we accept the emotion that unravels the answers. and even then, more truths will appear, despite the control rein we hold. control is a word coined to ensure that you never step out of line. a line that doesn't even exist.

take the gamble, risk the fear and reach for the unknown.

surface

2005-12-07T16:50:00.000+08:00

if you're careful all the time, then what's it worth?

life in theatre

2005-12-05T22:53:00.000+08:00

" Never before, when it is life itself that is in question, has there been so much talk of civilization and culture. And there is a curious parallel between this generalized collapse of life at the root of our present demoralization and our concern for a culture which has never been coincident with life, which in fact has been devised to tyrannize over life.

Before speaking further about culture, I must remark that the world is hungry and not concerned with culture, and that the attempt to orient toward culture thoughts turned only toward hunger is a purely artificial expedient.

What is most important, it seems to me, is not so much to defend culture whose existence has never kept a man from going hungry, as to extract, from what is called culture, ideas whose compelling force is identical with that of hunger.

We need to live first of all; to believe in what makes us live and that something makes us live - to believe that whatever is produced from the mysterious depths of ourselves need not forever haunt us as an exclusively digestive concern.

...If confusion is the sign of the times, I see at the root of this confusion a rupture between things and words, between things and the ideas and signs that are their representation.

...We must insist upon the idea of culture-in-action, of culture growing within us like a new organ, a sort of second breath; and civilization as an applied culture controlling even our subtlest actions, a presence of mind; the distinction between culture and civilization is an artificial one, providing two words to signify an identical function.

A civilized man judges and is judged according to his behaviour, but even the term "civilized" leads to confusion: a cultivated "civilized" man is regarded as a person instructed in systems, a person who thinks in forms, signs, representations - a monster whose faculty of deriving thoughts, is developed to an absurdity.

If our life lacks brimstone, i.e., a constant magic, it is because we choose to observe our acts and lose ourselves in considerations of their imagined form instead of being compelled by their force. And this faculty is an exclusively human one. I would even say that it is this infection of the human race which contaminates ideas which should have remained divine; for far from believing that man invented the supernatural and the divine, I think it is man's age-old intervention which ultimately corrupted the divine within him.

What has lost us culture is our Occidental idea of art and the profits we seek to derive from it. Art and culture cannot be considered together, contrary to the treatment accorded them!

If the theatre has been created as an outlet for our repressions, the agonized poetry expressed in its bizarre corruptions of the facts of life demonstrates that life's intensity is still intact and asks only to be better directed.

Our petrified idea of the theatre is connected with our petrified idea of a culture without shadows, where, no matter which way it turns, our mind (esprit) encounters only emptiness, though space is full.

But the true theatre, because it moves and makes use of living instruments, continues to stir up shadows where life has never ceased to grope its way. The actor does not make the same gestures twice, but he makes gestures, he moves; and although he brutalizes forms, nevertheless behind them and through their destruction he rejoins that which outlives forms and produces their continuation.

For the theatre as for culture, it remains a question of naming and directing shadows: and the theatre, not confined to a fixed language and form, not only destroys false shadows but prepares the way for a new generation of shadows, around which assembles the true spectacles of life.

To break through language in order to touch life is to create or recreate the theatre; the essential thing is not to believe that this act must remain sacred.

This leads to the rejection of the usual limitations of man and man's powers, and infinitely extends the frontiers of what is called reality.

We must believe in a sense of life renewed by the theatre, a sense of life in which man fearlessly makes himself master of what does not yet exist, and brings into being. And everything that has not been born can still be brought to life if we are not satisfied to remain mere recording organisms.

Furthermore, when we speak the word "life," it must be understood we are not referring to life as we know it from its surface of fact, but to that fragile, fluctuating center which forms never reach. And if there is still one hellish, truly accursed thing in our time, it is our artistic dallying with forms, instead of being like victims burnt at the stake, signaling through the flames."

extracted from Antonin Artaud's 'The Theatre And Its Double' (Grove Press)

The Diva & The Showgirl

2005-12-04T23:32:00.000+08:00

Today, my friend Mikael who's just come home for the holidays, gave me a precious gift: the Kylie Showgirl DVD. It was released last week and recorded from Kylie Minogue's Showgirl tour which was abruptly cut short when she discovered she had breast cancer. She began the tour early this year and was scheduled to close the tour in her home country, Australia, in late May. I am one of millions of her devoted fans.

I remember I first saw her in Neighbours. I must've been about 12 or 13. Like two of her songs, it was love at first sight. Then she released her first single, Loco-motion, which became the biggest selling single of the 80s in Australia. I didn't even know that it was released until one day, my synchronized swimming trainer said we were doing a new routine to this song. I asked who it was and the rest, you know, is history.

Many years on, and I collected every available piece of recorded material she had, but I never had the opportunity of watching her perform live. (I've been on stage with her sister Dannii but I'll leave that for another day.) Till one day, another great friend, Cheng Han, calls from Sydney and teases me about buying tickets to watch Showgirl. She called the ticketing agent but the tickets were sold out. She called the day they released them. She then tried another agent and could only wing us seats somewhere in Siberia. Well, I didn't expect to go anyway. When Kylie tours, her tickets sell out fast. BUT, at the end of the week, Cheng Han calls and says "Guess What?!?" Not only did she get them but she scored seats 2 rows off the stage front! And as luck would have it, the MAS Travel fair came a week later.

Come May 19th, I was ready. I arrived in Sydney 2 days before the show and on that very day, Kylie was admitted to hospital.

My lifetime dream. It will come true. All my dreams do.

Because of Kylie, the statistics of women in Australia having mammogram tests rose by over 200%. The same effect was seen the world over.

Kylie completes her chemotherapy this week. Not everyone is that lucky. For those of us in cities, medical expertise is close at hand. Early detection is better than no detection. Or ignoring pain.

My mother is a cancer survivor but my father, unfortunately, detected it too late. He was gone in 10 days. May he rest with the angels.

You know the moral of the story. Feel yourself up sometimes.

At Large

2005-12-04T11:36:00.000+08:00

"Theology,by its nature of presenting absolute answers, makes people insolently arrogant in their relation with the universe."

- Bertrand Russell's "History of Western Philosophy"

melodramatic

2005-12-03T23:01:00.000+08:00

...there is nothing mellow about being dramatic.

I'm tired as hell, my shoulder is aching and this blocked nose of mine is taking away my enjoyment from some much needed couch potatoing with my trusty remote control. So, what does one do? One decided to see how many people have read one's last post.

I send an email out to 80 people asking them to read my last post in hope that all of them would go pick a star off the chrissy tree at the Regent Hotel. One person said definately and she was going to pop-in while she was in the city. Three more replied saying they had a wonderful read. Okay. 82 kids left to make happy. There are 85 stars.

I was just listening to 'What Else Is There?" the new single by Royksopp and having bought the album months ago, i only just listened to the lyrics (usually I'm swaying to it) and realised how apt...

I don't know what more to ask for, I was given just one wish

I believe in dreams coming true. It's my business. I'm not one to sit in an office and wait for that paltry monthly reward. I wanted to be somebody. Oh, come on, who doesn't want to make a difference? I'm doing what I love and you can never question my passion for it. My work these past 11 years can attest to it.

I was recently told I didn't realise how successful I actually was and told to embrace it. It's a small pond we have here in Malaysia. One bit part in a play and you think you're a star. I'm no bit part actor but with such a small pond, I ain't gonna go splashing around. I'm very content to swim leisurely, enjoying my surroundings. I try to be humble when I must but when i can use it for a purpose, I'll use it. I'm not the only one. Damn it! I was the first of my peers who appeared on stage, film, TV, print and radio all at the same time, I think it's about time for some payback. Someone up there made me famous, so, I'll be selling my face, and my gorgeous voice, to help make some kids smile. Anyone for that matter.

I'm tired of talking to adults. Most of them don't listen. They only hear you when you've said something they don't want to hear. Selective Hearing perhaps? Sod off!

I was given just one wish. And the stars shine bright tonight.

The Diva Awakes!

The Diva Series Album of the Night: The Understanding - Royksopp(Wall of Sound Records)

If you're lost, you can look and you will find me...

2005-12-03T11:35:00.000+08:00

I wake up this morning in a luscious king-sized bed at the Westin KL after what was a very long but very fulfilling Friday.

At 10:30 am, i was asked to be the Guest of Honour at the Regent Hotel's launch of it's 'Stars on The Christmas Tree' event. In my previous post (Interlude: Addict) I wrote of children whose parents pushed them too hard. On Friday, i met parents who did what they could to ease their children's pain.

The Regent Hotel KL does this event every year. The management put up a tree in the middle of the lobby and hang golden stars on the branches with names of children who suffer from cancer and other bloody illnessess. The purpose of these stars are for those of us who want to make a dying child smile simply by picking a star and giving this child a gift. The hotel plans to collect all these presents and give them to the children by the 21st of December. All these children go through radio- and chemotherapy. Some are only 2 years old.

One little boy, only 2 and a half, came with his mother straight after his chemo sesssion. She brought him because she wanted him to unwind from the stress of chemo and have a chance of playing with the other children, something he doesn't do much of because he's in the hospital at least 3 times a week. She told me he was an active, bubbly child once. The little boy could hardly lift his arm and only managed a smile when i said goodbye to him 2 hours later. His name is Daniel.

Here's a tearjerker for you: Some of them won't live long enough to get these presents. So please (if you're in KL, Malaysia), go to the Regent Hotel KL and pick a star... Make a child smile.

The rest of the day was my corporate emcee event. Fun, Bling-Bling, I get paid lots. Like that lah. Got pissed drunk from the free booze, had strange dreams and here I am now.

Today, I'm going to my friend's 5 year-old son's birthday. He, no doubt, will be getting everything he wants.

Some children are so lucky. Really?

The Diva Series Album of the Morning: Billie Holiday - Lady Sings The Blues (Verve Classics)

waking up is hard to do

2005-12-02T09:26:00.000+08:00

The Diva Series (morning) Album of the Day: Texas - Red Book (Mercury Records)

Interlude: Addict

2005-12-01T21:22:00.000+08:00

The French have a saying, When you do something twice, there will always be a third. This is my third post of the day (and I only just started). But like most things, i wonder how long this 'fix' will last. What is this blogging phenomena? It's going around faster than the flu i caught today. Because of it, I've spent the past hour reading blogs of the world. My brother has one. He tried to get me to start one months ago but I told him I had other 'fixes' to attend to. I then narrowed the search to blogs in my country and I am in awe of some of them. Some people have such strong voices and their words only make you ponder about the mysteries of our lives. Some mysteries are banal, others downright ridiculous.
The one that keeps nagging me in the behind of my bald diva head is this one: The technological advancements of today have led to the lack of personal communication. Yes, I know. Age-old argument many have argued. It annoys me that children are given handphones at an early age and SMS has become the method for saying a simple hello. Then comes the battle of who has the newest, flashiest handphone or gadget. A phone is a phone. Not a status symbol.
A status symbol, in my definition, is when you have a crown on your head and people refer to you as "Your Royal Highness." Some may call me a Queen, thank you so much for giving me a throne, but I prefer you write my name on a cheque. I won't be able to bestow upon you a title but I will buy you a new handphone.
Moving right along.
I was told off for not replying to an SMS that said, "See you in 10 minutes." I was told off 10 minutes after i got this SMS . The person who sent it to me was standing in front of me 10 minutes after i got the SMS. You see where I'm going with this?
Such wonderful values we seem to be instilling in our children. However, not all parents are evil. Just those who don't teach their children the finer points of life.
I work with children when I have the time and it scares me what some parents do with their god-given responsibilties of parenthood. I understand that every parent only wishes the best for their child but sending a 5 year-old to a Mensa class where she has to learn 60,000 new words by the end of the week, then off to a dance class for 12 year-olds and pre-school tuition classes... I'm sorry what? Pre-school tuition?? I met this little girl when I was about to start enrollment for my 7-9 year-old theatre program. I sat in the playroom with this little girl after i told her parents to leave us for a few minutes. They insisted that she was 'mature' enough to join the class. I spent a half hour with her trying to get her use her creative imagination. Most children have a magical forest in their heads and can come up with some wonderful magical creatures once asked. But this little girl couldn't even look me in the eye when she answered my questions. She was talking to me but her eyes were focused on the wall behind me. I asked her if she knew why she was here. She said she didn't. She said came because her mummy said she had to. 5 years-old and without choices.

We have forgotten how to play... getting dirty in the mud, dancing in the rain, life's little pleasures... The tsunami may have hit last year but the waves started washing over us a long time ago.

The Diva Series Album of the Day Part 2: Anita Baker - Christmas Fantasy (Blue Note Records)

Series One: Flying a kite.

2005-12-01T18:47:00.000+08:00

This was something done for the play I directed last year. It was projected on a round screen 8ft. in diameter and the actor stood in front of it. It gave the illusion of the kite strapped to his back. I'm posting it because I'm very proud of the person who designed it. Sidney Tan. This is just one of many. Thanks Sid.

Series One: Let's start with...

2005-12-01T18:12:00.000+08:00

December 1. World AIDS Day. Okay, there's the awareness created. There's no such thing as Safe Sex. It's just Safer Sex. Be clever about it. Now, on with the show.
I've recently been re-introduced to the joys of the uber-diva singers of our musical history: Sarah, Ella, Billie, Betty, Dinah. the list goes one which leads me to the album I'm listening to at this very moment, Harry Connick, Jr.'s 25 album. No, he ain't a diva but he falls in that category of amazing musicianship.
I listen to a lot of music. I will end each blog entry with the Diva Series Album of the Day. If you'd like to sample it, pop into Victoria Music Centre and have a taste. Yes, still the best place to get your music fix. I don't do Towers. I'll leave the populist culture to the populists.
I love our world. This asian side that is. While the rest of the world is going through a Post-materialistic phase, we in Asia have decided that flash bling-bling is it. A lot of selfish people out there on the streets today. But that's just the way it is. A society, like an individual, has to go through the learning process. Hopefully, we'll come out the better. And that's why I love it so. Just to sit down with some caffeine and watch the daily goings-on of people. I'm prey to it to. I want everything! I don't need it, just wanting makes me feel better about myself. And then when i finally lay my hands on it... You understand, yes?
Tomorrow I do charity work, which balances out this selfishness of mine.
Oh, very important! Please smile whenever you pass someone and see them eye to eye. Don't just walk past. Staring is rude. Just smile. I smiled at someone today. He looked at me and thought I was mad. Well, like that lah.

The Diva Series Album of the Day: Anita O'Day's Finest Hour (Verve Records)
www.vervemusicgroup.com